Written by: Nigel Edokpolo (Registered Psychotherapist- Qualifying)

Stress is an everyday part of our lives and can be detrimental to our health at times, but on the other hand, it can also be beneficial and how you use your stress will determine how someone comes out of a situation.

When people hear the word stress, they think of typically negative aspects relating to it, such as having to write a test, finishing a 20-page paper, paying rent, cleaning the house, and the championship game. Even more, stress can be related to the more minor things in life, such as trying to beat a boss in a video game, the anticipation of the serial killer in movies, and having the school call your parents. Some of you reading this can relate to this type of stress and understand that it’s not enjoyable, nor is it beneficial. But stress can also be positive, such as the examples below.

1. The birth of a child
2. A Job interview for one’s dream job
3. Deciding where to vacation
4. Buying a new car
5. Starting a new relationship

Everyone reading this currently has their different way of dealing with types of stress; even if we look at an example of preparing for a test, some people will study for hours, some people study the night before cause some people study the day of and during the test people may exhibit behaviours of stress such as sweating coughing, rapid breathing, eye twitches and various other behaviours, but not everyone exhibits the same thing behaviours.

Quote

It’s not stress that kills us; it’s our reaction to it.

Normalizing stress is important to understanding that we will all be stressed at various points in our lives, but the reaction is what gives or takes power away from us. Stress management is a common phrase you have probably heard prior to reading this wherein you use tools such as time management, graphing, note taking, reminders and other methods that allow for the management of concerns one is undergoing. What are the benefits of stress management tools?

Time management: Becoming secure with allotting certain tasks for a certain amount of time can help with a reduction of anxiety and stress.

Note-taking: This allows you to prioritize tasks and assign a hierarchy of most important to least important in a visual manner.

Graphing: Similar to note-taking, it allows for an artistic visual that can provide insight into areas of stress and help prioritize what someone views as most important, such as using a pie graph.

Reminders: Setting alerts on your phone, marking days and times on your fridge calendar, sticky notes around the home, and sticky notes app on the computer to pop up every time you log on.

While stress management is proactive, sometimes stress can be unexpected and take us by surprise, but referring back to the quote, it is the REACTION that harms us, which is why being proactive is not enough; being reactive is a part of the strategy to help cope.

Stress reduction

You may typically hear about stress reduction in counselling, but it is very much individualized and easy to incorporate into your own lives without having to attend therapy. Stress reduction is an opportunity for individuals to reduce bodily and emotional tension. We tend to think of stress just with our minds, but our bodies can and will take a toll if we neglect ourselves and we all have a responsibility to ourselves to partake in self-care. What does stress reduction look like and include you may ask?

• Exercise: Physical movement is beneficial under stress and naturally for the body, which can be going for a jog, boxing, basketball, tennis, yoga, weight lifting, etc.
• Meditation: Thinking exercises that involves focusing on the present moment and being in tune with oneself. This can be done in a quiet room, focusing on the positives and blocking the negatives for 15-45 minutes.
• Relaxation training: Relaxation is noticing the stress in all parts of one’s body. While better with a therapist to assist, it is still managing oneself by taking deep breaths, recognizing where the stress feels predominant, and then relaxing that part of the body.

The benefits of stress management and reduction are important to our everyday lives and as individuals, we try to control our stress and when it happens, but sometimes it leads us to more stress. There are times in life that we cannot control and can lead to our stress, but remember that stress can be good or bad; it can also be terrible, harmful, annoying, mediocre, etc. It just depends on how YOU react to the stress at hand.